Antoine's

[Elda Forever]

Yukito Maki

All of Yukito's attempts at consoling or advising - or whatever it was he was hoping to accomplish with the idiotic rambling pouring between his lips right now - were met with quiet, tearful nods from Kagasan. Yukito tried to smile, but failed at that, too.

"Kagasan..." He started to explain more, to elaborate on a level that would let his friend know that he might have actually understood on different terms. But the sinking feeling that he hadn't been very helpful at all didn't help assure him enough to go on, and he found himself trying to communicate those thoughts with just a look.

"They'll be back soon." He mumbled stupidly. Kagasan just nodded, still not speaking.

"Don't forget - Erin and I had our ugly points, too. Though those were mostly my doing..."

"Yeah, but you don't already know you're gonna mess it up," Kagayaki muttered, looking away. "Because you and Saikochan are in it together. You're both up to speed. I can't... I can't get her back for the life of me. You and Saikochan are adjusting to each other. Just when Cassiechan and I started adjusting..." Kagayaki just shook his head. "It's like starting father back than the beginning."

"I did know I'd mess it up. I sabotaged us from the beginning," he said, feeling as if this last sentence was a revelation but unsure how.

"I'm just waiting for myself to mess up worse than ever again. Because I love her more than I've ever loved anyone... and she actually loved me, I think. Before. And that means we'll both hurt more than ever before, right?" He shrugged, standing up. "I have to go see why they're not back yet... It's driving me crazy."

Yukito didn't say anything, just offered a shrug to his friend and staring at the tablecloth. Don't take too long. And don't do anything stupid, he mentally offered.

[More than Music]

Kagayaki Aidou

Carefully, he went the way he'd seen Erinchan and Cassie disappear. Kagayaki got nervous as he got closer to the door of the girls' bathroom. They weren't being all that quiet, so he could hear their conversation.

"...and we'd been swimming, so... it was... not so... good... And he told me why we couldn't do that..." Erinchan. What was she talking about? Why did she start talking all really quiet after that? It was really hard to hear her... He bit his lip a little and was about to knock when Erinchan's volume went up again. "But Cassie, it can be done. It can work. It really, really can! Please don't give up, Cassie... please."

There was that suffocating feeling again. 'Give up? She... she's having second-thoughts? No... Cassie...' He drew back, trying to tell himself he'd heard Erinchan wrong.

"I don't know, Erin! I tried. I've been trying. I am trying. And I guess I can try harder. But...I just don't know how much more I can take. I just...I hate this whole thing...I hate it!" Cassie's words sent a sensation through him he distinctly remembered being like shrapnel digging into his skin. He swallowed hard, trying to keep himself from shaking. "But that doesn't matter now. I just...how? How do I tell him--all of you--what you can and can't do, when I don't even really know the answer to that myself?"

Erinchan's reply was too quiet for him to hear. He had a feeling he shouldn't have heard this. 'I should have seen this coming. I'm doing this all wrong... I should know how to take care of her, how to help her through this. And I don't. I have no business saying I love her if I can't give her what she needs when she needs it most. This is all wrong...'

The girls exchanged some quiet words, and before Kagayaki realized it, Erinchan was stepping out the door. He jumped when he saw her and ran into some poor waiter that had been walking behind him. The guy let out a cry and started saying something so fast he didn't understand it, quick to get himself back together and leave the scene. Kagayaki wasn't so lucky, finding himself looking back at the girls, stuck in place like he was cemented there.

"Eto..." What could he do now? He'd been standing outside the door. Maybe, if he'd been successful and hadn't cried, this could all be covered up-- Nope. He reached up to his cheek to feel wetness there. Drying his face with his sleeve desperately, he stiffened a little and bit his lip. "I... I sorry..." 'I'm sorry I ruined everything for you. I'm sorry I can't just control myself. I'm sorry I'm such a horrible boyfriend. I'm sorry I came back here when you obviously wanted to be alone. I'm sorry I listened in on your conversation because I shouldn't have. I'm sorry... I should be trying to make you feel better.' He smiled, and it came easier as he looked at them. "Was worry." Kagayaki offered a hand to each of the girls. "Me... I be takin' you back now, yah?" It was a suggestion, a question. He wasn't sure if he had any right to ask this now. "Ne?" He kept his smile on. "Yah?"

[The Phantom of Paris]

Cassandra "Cassie" Wright

Now she felt guilty for snapping at her friend. "Oh, Erin, I know...I'm so sorry...when did you find out?" 'Sorry' didn't even begin to cover it, really. Sorry was such a cop-out of a word. People threw sorrys around too liberally, reusing them and the excuses that came part and parcel with apologies until they didn't even mean anything anymore. I hate apologies.

Another hurt look came over Erin's face, and Cassie's heart sank. She's upset because I knew before she did. Because Yukito told me. Oh, God, Erin...how do I fix this? How?!

Cassie tried to give Erin a little smile, but found that she couldn't. She looked away. "Erin...Yukito was the one who found me that day. He saw it. He saw everything. And...and he freaked out, like he did at my birthday. After that, that's when he told me. I guess he felt he had to, as sort of an 'I'm here for you' thing, or maybe to explain why he had gone totally beserk and attacked. Erin, he didn't mean to tell me before you found out, I promise."

"After your birthday..." Erin began, sounding as if each word she spoke pained her, "we were on a date. And I, I, um, kissed him... lower than he wanted, and we'd been swimming, so... it was... not so... good... " Cassie shot a surprised look at her friend before looking away, a blush creeping up over her face. Oh... "And he told me why we couldn't do that...I wish I would have known before... But he did tell me, and we talked about it, and we'll still talk about it, Cassie. He said that he can't tell me where the line is, because he doesn't really know either, but when he does know, he has to be okay with telling me and I have to be okay with listening, and then we can get it and understand it better and all, and it's not like this huge wall that we keep hitting over and over...But Cassie, it can be done. It can work. It really, really can! Please don't give up, Cassie... please."

Before Cassie could stop it, she was practically shouting again, letting her stupid emotions get the better of her again. "I don't know, Erin! I tried. I've been trying. I am trying. And I guess I can try harder. But...I just don't know how much more I can take. I just...I hate this whole thing...I hate it! But that doesn't matter now. I just...how? How do I tell him--all of you--what you can and can't do, when I don't even really know the answer to that myself?" Angrily, she grabbed a nearby hand towel and roughly brushed the remaining tears from her eyes, flinging it to the floor when she was done. That's what the bathroom attendants are for, she thought brattily, selfishly.

"Just tell us," Erin said quietly. "Just say, 'I don't want that', or 'no', or 'not now, please', or something, but just... say it..."

Cassie could only sigh, partly because she knew Erin was probably right and partly because she didn't know what else to do. "Fine. I can try. I can't make any promises, but I can try." She glanced towards the door. "They're probably worried or something by now..."

"Cassie... I'm sorry. Can we start it over?"

She pasted on a smile. "Sure."

They hadn't gone more than two steps out the door when Erin bumped into Kagayaki. Like a domino effect, he in turn bumped into the helpless waiter behind him. "Oh!" he cried. "I beg your pardon, sir! I didn't see you there!" Neither did we.

"Eto..." he began, that go-to word in Japanese that Cassie couldn't understand. She narrowed her eyes. What are you doing over here? Why aren't you back at the table with Yukito? "I... I sorry...Was worry. Me... I be takin' you back now, yah? Ne? Yah?"

Cassie shot a suspicious look towards the hand he offered. Her mind had been made up ever since she had fled the table--no more touching tonight. From anyone. If even one more person touched her, she would freak. She couldn't handle anymore...she would leave..."What are you doing here?" she snapped, her eyes flashing. "Were you listening to us or something? Were you?"

She brushed past him and back to the table, sitting down as she struggled not to burst into tears. "You were right," she murmured to Yukito. "You were absolutely right."

[GGJ5]

Erin Spenser

"Oh, Erin, I know...I'm so sorry...when did you find out?"

You knew... I'm the one he loves, but he trusted you more... Her face fell despite her efforts. Cassie still saw.

"Erin...Yukito was the one who found me that day. He saw it. He saw everything. And...and he freaked out, like he did at my birthday. After that, that's when he told me. I guess he felt he had to, as sort of an 'I'm here for you' thing, or maybe to explain why he had gone totally berserk and attacked. Erin, he didn't mean to tell me before you found out, I promise."[/b]

Erin just nodded. hat could she say that wouldn't ruin things anymore? But still, all she could think was He knew. And he didn't tell me. You knew about him, and didn't tell me... He knew...

Instead, Erin gave a choppy, vague, and embarrassed explanation of how she'd stumbled across the thing that Yukito had chosen to confide in her friend first. She tried to salvage it with a plea, though... really, she wanted things to work for Cassie, but she had to try! Like Yukito was trying! "It can work. It really, really can! Please don't give up, Cassie... please."

"I don't know, Erin! I tried. I've been trying. I am trying. And I guess I can try harder. But...I just don't know how much more I can take. I just...I hate this whole thing...I hate it! But that doesn't matter now. I just...how? How do I tell him--all of you--what you can and can't do, when I don't even really know the answer to that myself?" To her surprise, Cassie yanked a hand towel, pushed it to her face, then introduced it to the floor. Erin only looked up from the tiles to her friend with concern and worry etched into her face.

"Just tell us," she tried to explain. "Just say, 'I don't want that', or 'no', or 'not now, please', or something, but just... say it..."

Cassie sighed, and Erin was sure she'd gone and said something stupid again. She didn't know what to do with stuff like this... she never did, and she never would. That was how it was. "Fine. I can try. I can't make any promises, but I can try." She glanced towards the door. "They're probably worried or something by now..."

"Cassie... I'm sorry. Can we start it over?"

She smiled. Could she really be feeling good enough to smile already? The expression eased some of Erin's tension. Yes, she felt a little-- okay, a lot-- hurt with the knowledge that Cassie and Yukito practically bore their souls to each other and left her in the dark... And yes, she would probably go be a baby and cry about it later... But more than that, she saw her friend, aching and trying to make the ache stop, and now she was smiling and all Erin wanted was for it to be true. "Sure."

Erin smiled with relief. Thank God. She caught herself as she felt herself falling into the automatic "apology-and-make-up-hug", quickly clasping her hands as nonchalantly as possible behind her back. "Let's go, then."

Outside, Erin's eyes met with a stumbling Aidousan crashing against a waiter, tossing them both into bumbling apologies. "Aidousan?!" Erin asked, eyes open in pure surprise. "Woah!" She offered out her hands to help steady him.

"I... I sorry...Was worry. Me... I be takin' you back now, yah? Ne? Yah?"

Even though he was talking to Cassie, Erin nodded in reply. "Let's go!" she said, relatively chipper compared to how she'd just been talking to Cassie in the bathroom. Without looking back at the two, she slipped back to their table and returned to her seat beside Yukito. For a moment she rested her head on his shoulder and sighed. "I need to work on my 'Dear Abby' skills..." she mumbled before lifting her head to send him a small smile. "Did you order for me?"

Cassie and Aidousan were back, and Cassie mumbled something Erin didn't catch. Her face fell into concern one more time. She turned to Yukito, suddenly feeling selfish and wanting him to talk to her, to tell her, to confide and trust in her... Or at least to pay attention to her now. It was their first double date, it couldn't go down in flames over one tiny mistake... Erin was determined. "Did you miss me?" she asked, perking up and grinning at him.

[Elda Forever]

Yukito Maki

He was surprised by how short an amount of time it took everyone to get back. The feeling of being isolated didn't last. Cassie looked flustered and still way too upset to have been calmed by the sight of Aidousan. Yukito met his friend's eyes, expected some sort of sign from him as to what had resulted from his attempts at escorting. Meanwhile, Erin slid down next to him, resting her head on his shoulder and sighing. He turned, caught scent of her hair again, and kissed the top of her head. "I need to work on my 'Dear Abby' skills..." she mumbled before lifting her head to send him a small smile. He lifted his hands defensively.

"Hey, don't look at me. I can promise I'm worse at it than you," And he felt sorry for it each individual time he tried, as though he expected himself to get better at it.

"Did you order for me?"

"No opportunity, yet. Not like I can pronounce anything here anyways." He leaned over to show her the picture of his Filet de truite meuniere. "It's a Filet de-something-or-other. True-it-eh... Meh-uhn-ee-air?" He shook his head. "If we happen to drop by France, I'm useless."

Looking on the edge of her self-control, Cassie had sat down at the table across from him. "You were right," she murmured to Yukito. "You were absolutely right."

He arched an eyebrow at her, but there was no teasing in the gesture, only disbelief, "I'd like to think so. But more often than not I couldn't be farther from the truth." He lifted one shoulder, "I get by on pure luck and the fact that I'm not suicidal."

Erin sent him another look, seeming to want his complete attention. Or at least a change of mood. "Did you miss me?" she asked, perking up and grinning at him.

Yukito gave a shrug, as though he couldn't decide, "Maybe, maybe not... what do you think?"

[GGJ5]

OOC: Okay, gonna try to wrap this up really really really soon... But please let me know if I need to change something, all right? BIC:

Erin Spenser

"I need to work on my 'Dear Abby' skills..." Erin muttered to him with a slight smile. Cassie's words had wounded her, knowing Yukito preferred to share his secrets with her than with his girlfriend; however, because Cassie was the source of this information, Erin was finding it easier to be mad at her than to be mad at him.

Yukito just lifted his hands defensively, saying, "Hey, don't look at me. I can promise I'm worse at it than you."

I'm sure, she thought wryly, then quickly reprimanded herself. She was going to get back to their good date, and make him remember her again, if it killed her. "Did you order for me?"

"No opportunity, yet. Not like I can pronounce anything here anyways." He leaned over to show something on the menu, and her smile came easily. "It's a Filet de-something-or-other. True-it-eh... Meh-uhn-ee-air?" Erin let out a laugh at the effort. "If we happen to drop by France, I'm useless."

"Oh, please, just point at it, and you'll be fine," Erin answered easily, quickly, and with a dismissive gesture of her hand. "It's what I would do," she added in a conspiratorial whisper. Just then, Cassie muttered something to Yukito, reminding Erin powerfully of how much she resented being the second, and Yukito's confidence in the downcast redhead. Deftly she turned up the charm, pulling for his complete attention. "Did you miss me?" she asked brightly, giving him a smile.

Yukito gave a shrug. "Maybe, maybe not... what do you think?"

"Aww..." Erin pouted at the neutral response, leaning in close to him, linking her arm in his so she could hold his hand, too. She tilted her face up toward him, her head just touching his shoulder as her free hand played a little with the ends of his hair. "Not even just a little?"

-----

Eventually, they'd ordered, and their plates arrived, and the food really was delicious. But Erin was set on Yukito, on keeping his attention, on trying to do everything to remind him that she was the one he loved the most, and that he was there for her.

As they left the restaurant, once again Erin kept her arm locked around his, walking as close as she could beside him without getting in either one's way of walking. "You wanna go to a movie?" she asked him quietly, not wanting the other two to overhear, and wanting their talk to be just them. She figured she wasn't made for this double-date stuff, as fun as she'd hoped it would be. "Just us... or I could stay at your house for a little while... " She gave him a puckish smile, hoping he'd say he wanted time with just her, too. The entire ride home, Erin spent with her attention solely on Yukito, thoroughly succeeding in ignoring the others.

[More than Music]

Kagayaki Aidou

"Oh!" he cried. "I beg your pardon, sir! I didn't see you there!"

"Eto..." He hadn't even said anything yet and Cassie was already mad at him, he could see it in her face. 'Please don't hate me...!' "I... I sorry...Was worry. Me... I be takin' you back now, yah? Ne? Yah?" H held a hand out to both Cassie and Erinchan.

"Let's go!" Erin sang, leading the way.

Cassie seemed less thrilled. "What are you doing here?" That made Kagayaki shrink back a little. "Were you listening to us or something? Were you?"

The air caught in his throat. "Cassiechan... I--" She ignored him, moving away. He let his face fall. "I... I sorry..." he whispered, to himself, because he was the only person left there now. He sulked back to the table, taking his seat next to Cassie but not saying a word to her. 'I'm sorry I've made you hate me again...' He clasped his hands in his lap. 'I'm sorry...'

He didn't say a word all night. When the waiter came, he shook his head and tried to explain he didn't want anything, and somehow managed to order a weird dish with chicken and white sauce. Luckily, it wasn't all that bad, but he didn't eat much of it. Every so often, he'd steal a glance at Yukito and Erin, smiling softly at them. That was when he would feel Cassie beside him and the smile would fade.

'We should be like that, Cassie. I wish you still loved me... Even if that can't happen, I would have liked it better if it had actually been my fault. Then I could just say that I'll do better, but... I've gotten better. I guess... I guess we're just not meant to be.'

'I give up.'

On the ride home, Kagayaki curled up in his seat and stared out the window, catching Cassie's reflection every so often. He closed his eyes. This wasn't what he'd wanted...


Kagayaki is done here